


Confrence of The Sub-Creators or The Brother Gods Get Chewed Out

by RetroAce241



Category: Bionicle - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Marvel, RWBY, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien, Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Other, Satire, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 10:15:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25469161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RetroAce241/pseuds/RetroAce241
Summary: The Brother Gods of the RWBY-verse continue to watch as their world grows darker and teams RWBY, remains of JNPR, and SSSN all struggle and toil. But when a departed soul escapes their prison of an afterlife and finds her way to a higher power. She tells that power what has transpired, and soon this higher power intervenes and the Brothers have a LOT to answer for.Features OCs for an upcoming original storyNOTE: This is a vent fic created for the sole purpose of satire and riffing, it should not be taken too seriously and not seen as accurate representations of the aforementioned characters nor accurate theologies of each respective worldWARNING: CONTAINS OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE
Kudos: 8





	Confrence of The Sub-Creators or The Brother Gods Get Chewed Out

**Conference of The Gods or The Brother Gods get chewed out**

* * *

**Part 1: The Trial**

* * *

  
  


In a realm beyond Remnant, beyond its universe, lies a great hall that is a paradise for many characters departed. Dwelling in this place are many sub-creators who wielded the power to created worlds and races, they are given this power by a supreme deity, who has gone by many names **Eru Iluvatar, Emperor Over the Sea** , but the sub-creators simply refer to him as **The One.**

The One is infinite love and wisdom and will intervene in the creations of his subordinates if need be. He has done this many times before, he had brought back his son from death at the hands of a witch, he had raised up one of his lesser angels with new power, and he has done many other great things. He sits in his timeless halls, contemplating with his latest sub-creator, a new and young jester-like being colored orange, brown, and white. He had hair red is blood and eyes like shining red stars with six wings, as well as having a theatrical mask for a face colored a brilliant orange and on his left shoulder, a brown pauldron shaped like a serious face, and on his right, a white pauldron shaped merry face, he went by the name of **Aetherius.** He spoke to The One about his plans in creating a new multiverse he brainstormed with his cohorts.

“You and your friends' ideas sound quite interesting, I believe you are ready to wield the flame imperishable Aetherius.” The One spoke in a benevolent and indescribable voice

“Oh thank you, master! I promise I won’t-” The young creator spoke until the voice of a girl cried out

“Please! Please someone, anyone out there please speak to me!” She cried

This voice did not belong to a sub-creator. Rather it belonged to a departed mortal creation, a girl with red hair and green eyes and olive skin. She was dressed in a ghostly bronze garb and rushed forward as if she was lost and afraid, she looked up as saw the great being upon his throne, she fell back and she trembled

“A mortal creation?” Aetherius spoke surprised

The girl trembled and began to hiccup and sniffle, frightened by the great sight. But The One looked down at her with a loving smile, and while the girl’s sorrow did not cease, her fear did.

“Now now my child, do not be afraid…I am the creator of all that is, Eru Iluvatar, The Emperor Over The Sea, but I am known first as the One…now child…who are you and why do you weep?” The One asked gently

“Pyrrha Nikos of Remnant…I…I…” The girl sniffled and tried to maintain composure, but rushed forward sobbing which Aetherius moved swiftly out of the way, and the girl buried her face into the robes of the supreme being and continued to cry “Everything in my world has gone terribly wrong!”

“Oh now now…come here…” the kind God reached down and picked her up in his great hand and stroked her back with the finger of his other “What has happened in your world…”

Upon which the girl spoke of everything that had transpired, though to Aetherius’ ears they were small whimpering squeaks, the One being infinite could understand her clearly. After she spoke, the expression of The One had changed…an expression of anger…he rose from his throne, draped his face in cloth, and gave the soul to Aetherius

_“Oh…shit…”_ Aetherius spoke…knowing this was not going to end well

“Aetherius, your first assignment…take care of this child while I get the other Sub-Creators and reach out to Valinor and Narnia…The Brothers have abused their power, and I want them here, **NOW.** ” His voice boomed as he moved down the halls as Pyrrha continued to cry

“Oh! Uh-uh! There there! Shhhh, it’s okay don’t cry! The One is gonna make everything all better! Shhhh-shhhh-shhh…” Aetherius tried to calm the child “Something tells me I’m gonna be doing this a lot when the new multiverse will be born, better get the early experience…” He spoke to himself as he tried to calm the girl down

* * *

In the far reaches of space, the Brother Gods watch the darkness unfold upon the world they created. The God’s watched with amused faces and chuckling, notably at the death of the one named Clover and the anguish of the one named Qrow

“Told you giving him Bad Luck as a semblance would add extra drama to the story.” The God of Darkness spoke as he pointed to the weeping crow

“Indeed, excellent move brother.” The God of Light replied with a nod

Upon which Clover’s soul seemed to fly towards them which then the God of Light clutched it

“Who are you?” Clover asked

“The God of Light and your role has ended, you're no longer useful to us. Be grateful for the time you had, for now, the void is what lies for you, like the others…” The God of Light spoke nonchalantly

“WHAT!?” Clover spoke in horror “Did I do something that offended you!? What did I do!?”

“Nothing, you're just useless now and we’ve grown bored of you, good-bye.” Which then he proceeded to open a hole in space and was about to toss the soul in. 

But before he could, his hand was caught by another, and it was not his brother. Turning around he saw another humanoid celestial, garbed in blue robes and had blue eyes and hair white as clouds and he wielded a scepter of sapphire. His face looked unamused.

“Hello, Luminos” The figure spoke

“Holy Shit! Manwë!?” The God of Light now known as Luminos spoke in shock, which the soul of Clover fled at the moment, hiding behind the figure now known as Manwë

“What the Hell are you doing here!?” The God of Darkness spoke taken aback

“For being sub-creators, you certainly are foul-tongued, especially you Umbros.” A female voice spoke which the God of Darkness, now known as Umbros, turned around and saw a female humanoid celestial who’s robes and hair were dark as the colors of space and dusted with stars.

“V-Varda!? How are you and your husband here?! Aren’t you both supposed to be in Valinor in Middle Earth!?” Luminos

“The One is bilocating us at the moment, and he is most **displeased** of what you have done with the power given to you. You are to come with us back to the Timeless Halls to answer for your crimes of abuse.” Manwë spoke, not letting go of the struggling hand

“Crimes?! Bullshit! My brother and I committed no crimes! Let me go you old bird!” Luminos yanked further

But before the brothers knew it, they were in the Timeless Halls. Before them was a large long table and from left and right downwards a number of Sub-Creators sat

The Spark of Primus

Mata Nui the Great Spirit

The Blue Brother and Red Brother

And a few Valar have been bilocated into the Timeless Halls

Nienna The Lady of Mourning who seemed to be holding a girl close to her, comforting her

Aluë and Yavanna

Mandos and Varië

Truth

And Aetherius who was accompanied six other figures who bore four wings instead of six.

One had black skin, hair the color of black and eyes like the sun and was dressed like a cross between a Blacksmith, Ironworker, and Foundry worker with an open blazer resting around his shoulders and held together by a string and two pins. He wore an Maroon Fedora with a gold ribbon and his clothes were in Art Deco in design and were colored Red, Gold, and Burgundy and welded an Art Deco golden hammer with a pure ruby handle.

The next was a woman with dark skin and eyes like the moon, her hair was a lot like Varda’s, as the night sky and dusted with silver stars, and wore a face veil that hid her lower face and lips, she was dressed in a beautiful dress that resembled a fortune teller in colors of purple, black, and silver. She seemed to have carried with her a sheathed dagger at her side that had a crescent moon on the Pommel

Another one was a man with tanned skin, hair brown as oak and eyes like the Sunset, he wore a white Stetson hat, his clothing seemed to be like that of a sheriff of the Wild West with colors of White, Earthy Brown, and Turquoise and patterns of Native American design, he seemed to have a fancy revolver in a holster on his right side

The next was a woman in Arabic clothing who like the purple woman had a face veil, her hair and eyes were ocean blue and like swirling tides. The colors of her clothes were of Turqouise, bronze, and Grey and she carried with her a shamshir that bore the colors of her clothes

Following another woman who had Irish skin and had hair was green as emerald and white eyes and had a dress of Celtic aesthetic colored in greens, browns, and marble white. She had a brown bow and an ivory quiver slung on her back filed with green arrows 

The last was a man with blonde hair and his eyes like flickering lightning, he was dressed in clothing that one could describe as a scientist from a cassette futuristic movie from the 1980s and early 90s, colors of his clothes being electric yellow, pink, and black. He wielded a halberd that had circuit board patterns on the sides of his blade and it also bore his colors.

All of the sub-creators, except Aetherious and his cohorts, had judgmental looks upon their faces, and the brother’s felt a weight upon both of them, for at the end of the table, The One sat in his throne with the cloaks hiding his face, but the light that was his being shone through

“Why isn’t Aslan here? Shouldn’t he be given how important this meeting supposedly is?” Umbros spoke in a passive-aggressive tone

“He is busy with Narnia at the moment. You two have much to answer for.” Mandos spoke grimly “We’ve been told of your abuses by a departed soul from the world you both co-created, and your machinations for it, and your intentions with the ones whom you have chosen. From what my wife and I have heard, we are absolutely disgusted.”

“A departed soul, from our world? Who?” Umbros spoke with rising anger

“Her.” Nienna spoke, which the girl looked to the brothers, it was Pyrrha.

“You!? How the fuck did you get out of the void of the dead!?” Luminos spoke shocked before looking at his brother “I thought you had the void secured tight!”

“I thought I did! I swear I put a dark seal on it and everything!” Umbros replied

“Well you didn’t put on tight enough you asshat!” Luminos snarked back

“Hey don’t get pissed at me!” Ubros barked back

“You both are horrible! What’s happening in Remnant you share fault in!” Pyrrha spoke with anger and sorrow

“You little fucking snitch! We helped you become an immortal legend by death and this is how you repay us!? Like Salem, you will be punished for your infidelity!” Luminos rose and tried to reach for her

Pyrrha screamed and Nienna clutched her close while Manwë raised his hand and sent a powerful gust of holy wind that blew the being of light against the wall. Pyrrha began crying again and Nienna held her close

“How low of you, threatening a child! As if she had not been swindled and abused already!” Nienna scolded the God of Light

“Nienna, take the girl away to another part of the halls, and while you are at it, take the soul Manwë rescued as well. Her destiny and the destinies of the champions and those departed will be settled soon.” The One spoke to Nienna as Clover came to her side

“Very well master. Come child, this will all be remedied soon. You sir, follow. Shhhhhhhh there there girl, they cannot hurt you anymore.” The Lady of Mourning comforted the fallen gladiator.

“We have observed the events of your world, and you both have been found guilty of multiple crimes. Abuse of creation, instigation of conflict, and exploitation of morality and nobility for your own selfish ends.” Primus spoke in a deep electronic voice

“Oh yeah? And what are you guilty of Primus? Oh yeah, that’s right, being stupid enough to not notice that two of your prototype servants were defective and sided with your gluttonous brother? Oh, and how about the fact you only have one Prime at a time now and allowed your children to split into two warring tribes killing each other and dragging every planet in your galaxy with them?” Luminos snarked back

“That was from their own free will, something that you do not respect enough to leave people alone, rather you exploit it for your own amusement. Like how you made your champion, _the husband of a_ _princess suffering battered woman syndrome from her father,_ sick and die. You knew that given his virtuous nature, he would accept his fate not knowing how his wife would move on, all so you can see what makes a ‘good story’ and leaving that woman all alone.” Primus spoke unimpressed

“Yes, that is a good question, why **DID** you make your champion sick and die? What did it prove to others who looked up to him or Salem, hm?” The Blue Brother asked

“Also, what **DO** you do with the souls of the departed in your world?” The Red Brother added

“How do you teach morality to your creations also?” Mata Nui piled on

“And what exactly did you do in response to Salem’s sorrow before she rebelled?” Varda spoke sternly

“Okay, you know what, my brother and I can’t answer questions if you all talk at the same time!” Luminos snapped

“Enough.” The One spoke softly “Let us start with the Valar.”

The others nodded and Varda spoke

“Alright, from what I had been shown with the incident with Salem, she was a woman abused by her father who prayed to both of you to send someone to save her, so you did, Ozma, but then when she was just trying to get her life back together, you made Ozma sick and die. Why is that?” Varda asked in a very disapproving tone “What would have been so horrible to just leave them alone? She literally had nobody else to turn to and nowhere else to go.”

The God of light just sat there and just shrugged his shoulders

“What does that mean?” Manwe asked

“Not my problem or my brother’s. That’s life, crap happens, people die, nothing lasts forever. She needed to know that.” The God of Light spoke in an indifferent tone

Varda’s face began to show irritation “Oh? As if she didn’t already know that? Her mother died, her father abused her, she spent a long proportion of her life locked up, and she had to endure day after day of her father’s abuse. I’m pretty sure she was well aware that ‘That’s life, crap happens, people die’ and ‘nothing lasts’ forever.”

“Okay fuck it, it’s because happy endings are outdated weak, cowardly, and pandering bullshit. Seriously, heroes like them shouldn’t have happy personal lives, or at least not like that. It spoils them rotten. Too long have we sub-creators been stunting and retarding the progress of sub-creation with these cop-outs. We need to break tradition and norms and move beyond that and grow a set of balls. It’s been 20 ages now, those kinds of stories aren’t impressive, they served their own time and new worlds don’t need to be nor should they be like that anymore.” Luminos spoke in a very indignantly smug voice

“I knew it. The way you two were acting towards me, my husband, and the others. It’s the exact same thing my brother-in-law Melkor did. The same wheedling and sycophantic behavior to get the power you wanted, and once you did you spurn everyone who came before you and act your more enlightened than everyone else.” Varda “Giving you two callous ingrates the benefit of the doubt was such a mistake. Do you both have _ANY_ empathy for your sub-creations?”

“Seriously? Why is that even an issue? Why should we bother to try and be ‘empathetic’ to them?” Umbros

“Because you insensitive cretin, we are given the power to sub-create with the responsibility to love and care for our creations! That is one of the duties of the sub-creator!” Aetherius replied

“I’m sorry, who are you? Who’s this kid? And who the fuck are those other six around him?” Luminos snapped back

“This is Aetherius and the others are his cohorts, the smith one is Solarax, the dark one is his wife Umbarias, the electric one is Fulgrom and the aquatic one is his wife Aquitas, the one with the gun is Ventix and the huntress is his wife Silva. They are the Creati, the newest sub-creators here, they’re here to learn how _not_ to govern a world.” Mata Nui

“Excuse us!?” Umbros replied offended

“This is irrelevant to my question. You should have left them alone, or at least done something to console and help her move on and find love again!” Varda scolded them

“Why? Why should it be a sub-creator’s problem that one whiny little bitch can’t get the fuck over it? Who gives a fuck!?” Luminos started to get even more mad

“You know when individuals like you say that, it’s usually a desperate attempt to make it seem like nobody cares and marginalize opposition or trying to sound detached when they are deeply perturbed or offended. So I would say **_we_ ** do. **_We_ ** are the ones who _‘give a fuck.’_ ” Aule replied, “And you do too, given your defensive tones.”

“We didn’t have to do shit, what you suggest is just fucking stupid! It’s nothing but outdated sunshine and rainbows bullshit!” Umbros snarked

Varda gave a rather disapproving look

“Not only using labels and insults to delegitimize ideas you don’t like _incredibly_ conceited and childish, it’s the exact same thing that my brother-in-law Melkor did all the time. Mata Nui said it to Teridax, Primus said it to Unicron, and I will say it again to you, it’s the _exact_ same thing as when Melkor spoke lowly of the humans, elves, and dwarves. You're no better than them and you're acting like smug bullies.” Varda chided “Besides, those worlds you mock had plenty of tragedy, plus, Arwen has accepted the fate of waiting centuries to join her husband Aragorn, Frodo had to leave Middle Earth, and I’m pretty sure the champions who survived and became parents and spouses never took what they had for granted!”

“Yeahhhhhh no. Sorry lady, that’s not good enough. If even one single couple survives and makes it, it’s detrimental. It can all be just easily waved away.” Umbros dismissed

“Oh sure if you don’t count PTSD, visiting the graves of their loved ones!” Yavanna shouted

“Pffffft.” Was Luminos’ only response

“My champion, The Alchemist, lost his mother, lost his arm and leg and his brother’s soul was trapped in a suit of armor, and gave up his ability to perform Alchemy, his beloved nearly shot him and destroyed herself as she was tempted with revenge against the man who killed her parents, and his father lived a life of tragedy, a superior officer lost his sight, was also tempted at revenge for his friend, who was a loving husband and father, and hurt his beloved twice, and to you, that’s not good enough.” Truth asked

“Did the Alchemist or Officer lose their beloveds?” Luminos asked

“No…” Truth replied

“Kiddie shit.” Luminos snarked

“Why you arrogant little…” Truth growled

“Next Question, how do you teach morality to mortals in your world?” Primus ask

“We just...talk to them all and listen to them and just decide then,” Luminos replied

“You mean you have no temples? No clergy? No theologians or philosophers or spiritual leaders of any kind?” Primus spoke

“Why would we need that?” Umbros asked

“Because just having mortals come up and asking things from you is what could mislead people into thinking you can give them whatever they want. Which is what Salem probably thought. This is why organized religion is important! Without a hierarchy of religious leadership, clergy, teaching, morals, philosophies, and schools of thought, it makes it difficult to help mortals with complex issues like this!” Primus chided

“Oh come on, all that stuff is just convoluted bullshit! You all seriously waste your time on that trivial crap!” Umbros snarked

“Next question, what DO you do with the souls of the departed in your world?” The Red and Blue brothers asked, “Do you have any judgment passed onto them?”

“…not answering that…” Umbros

“In the name of The One you are obligated to answer!” Mata Nui demanded

“Alright! We just…put them away…that's it…they cease to exist” Luminos replied

“Put them away? Cease to exist? You know things don’t just ‘cease’, only The One bares that power.” Mata Nui replied

“Actually, the child named Pyrrha told me everything.” Nienna came back with a scornful look on her face “These two degenerates just indiscriminately dump the souls of the departed into this pitch-black cosmic void where the wicked torment the righteous and innocent! She said it was a nightmare to be trapped in, she was screaming for help!”

The others murmured to each other hearing this

“Fucking **SNITCH!** ” Umbros shouted

“Oh please, we would have found out what you two were doing inevitably, it was only a matter of time. No judgment of the dead? And cast them all aside like broken dolls? Putrid.” Mandos growled

“But they **_are_ ** broken dolls, they’re no longer useful! They served their purpose, when tools are used up they get thrown out! And then the other tools just immortalize them with memories and monuments and shit.” Luminos leaned back indifferent

“You two are absolutely unbelievable!” Nienna shook her head

“No, Varda’s himbo husband is unbelievable, and you too, you both being stupid enough to let Melkor out and fuck shit up back when you all were still in some stupid dispute about a bunch of magic rocks.” Luminos snarked “And don’t give me the “final resurrection” we don’t need that shit either. Resurrection is inherently bad! I mean, Olorin? He could have just responded on your stupid little island, and Aslan? What was the point of him dying if he was just resurrected again? What did he even sacrifice? Two words; Cop. Out.”

The Blue brother got irritated “It is fueled by the belief both spirit and matter are good and those who are righteous-”

“Yeah yeah ‘Shall never die but receive everlasting life’ and that’s retarded. It’s in passing they achieve immortality, unbound by death. They don’t need to float around in some magical place in the sky when they die and eventually zap them back into their bodies after they get cleaned up. Like, what does that do? You guys need to get with the times, they should be immortalized by memory and have their bodies rot in a hole in the ground, period.” Umbro snarked

“You both are full of horsefeathers. Do ya both seriously think you can just talk like that to ones who’ve been doing this job longer than ya both have?” Solarax disked

“Shut the fuck up, new kid! You haven’t created anything yet!” Umbros snapped

“We are not ‘kids’ Umbros” Umbarias spoke unimpressed “And you have been here a few ages before us, we are not too far behind.”

“You know, when my brother and I took these two under our apprenticeship, we left them running both our worlds for a while. Now that I look back on the problems my world is having at the moment…I’m beginning to have suspicions about these two…” The Blue Brother spoke

“Wait, what do you mean?” The Red brother and the others looked towards them

“I’m saying that I believe that Luminos and Umbros decided to toy with the lives of my champions…” The Blue Brother replied, summoning a bubble that showed incidents of his world, the heroes in them and their personal lives, notably upon a hero with an “S” on his chest and a man dressed in padded armor that was like a Bat and two women, one dressed in purple reporter’s clothes and another dressed in a padded suit that resembled a black cat, all of which seem to have them toil and struggle in endless misery or limited joy

“…Oh, fuck…” Umbros gulped

“Would you two like to explain this?” Primus asked grimly

“We were doing what these two couldn’t bring themselves to do! It was _too_ right! It had to be fixed!” Luminos replied which Umbros covered his own head

“Bro, no…” Umbros replied

“MY MULTIVERSE IS NOT DESIGNED TO BE THAT WAY, YOU ARROGANT SABOTEUR!” The Blue brother scolded

“IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN IF YOU WANTED TO TEACH THOSE MORTALS SOME CULTURE YOU COWARD!” Luminos replied in kind

“Do not speak to your superiors in such a manner!” Varda replied

“Manwe, can you tell your nag of a wife to shut the fuck up!?” Luminos replied

“Excuse me!?” Manwe 

“You're out of line!” Aule exclaimed

“Your worlds are out of line!” Umbros replied

“Dunderheaded prats!” Silvia insulted

“Fuck off lettuce head!” Luminos barked

“That’s my wife you're talking to, you son of a bitch!” Ventix threatened

“You wanna go new kid!? I’ll come over there and tear you a new asshole!” Luminos shouted

“Don’t be a jackass!” Fulgrom barked

“Fuck you circuit face!” Umbros bit back

“I do not see the need for that kind of language!” Aquitas replied

“If you new guys want to take this outside my brother and I will take all seven of you!” Luminos growled

**“ENOUGH!”** The One bellowed which shook the halls and frightened the Sub-Creators into silence

“After what I have heard, what I have observed, and what you both have confessed, it is decided what shall be done.” The One spoke with a now calm but sober tone

“Luminos and Umbros, you have betrayed the Oath of the Sub-Creators and have misused the power of the Flame Imperishable. You have not respected the free will and personal lives of your creations and exploited the virtue of your champions for your amusement, and have unleashed a horror upon it. Which now a set of children are forced to undertake without a chance of reward for themselves. Umbarias shall be bilocated to be sent to release the souls from the void and judge the dead, the righteous and innocent shall be brought to the Timeless Halls.” The One spoke

“What?” Umbros spoke

“As for the champions and their loved ones, when they die they shall be given a second chance at life, the one known as Pyrrha Nikos shall be returned to flesh and brought to the realm of the Creati, Avalon, and the others known as the teams RWBY, JNPR, SSSN, and the boy known as Oscar Pine will join her when they perish.” The One continued

_“What?”_ Luminos replied with irritation

“And you both shall be reduced to figureheads of your world which I will have direct control, and your access to the Flame Imperishable will be taken away.” The One finished

**“WHAT!?”** The Brother Gods both replied in self-righteous indignation

“The meeting is adjourned” The One finished and they all got back up and began to take their leave

“Y-You can’t do this! This is bullshit!” Luminos shouted “Did you hear what I just said!? I said this is BULLSHIT!”

“You certainly love to throw the word ‘Bullshit’ around a lot. Do you think it’s some magic word that delegitimizes any opposition to you?" Aule chided

“The only thing that’s ‘bullshit’ is your excuses” Yavanna replied

The brothers stood there in seething anger, the Creati passed them and they slowly turned their eyes to the jester

In their eyes, they were swindled by a bunch of newcomers


End file.
